Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Hump Day?

More like, "funk" day.
I used to look forward to blogging. I would lay in bed at night and write all sorts of cute stories in my head. Some of them even landed in my journal.
I'm a huge whiner in my offline life. That's why I like to take a break from that side of me and write about the good things in my online journal(s). I keep saying, "I'll update my journal when I have good things to blog about." Okay, so when the heck is something "good" going to happen? Huh?
Truthfully, there are a few potential good things in the works right now in our life. But just as sure as I mention them, I'll jinx them and I'm just not willing to take that chance.
Let me get the news over with first:
a) I haven't heard from the good doc, yet. I'll email him as soon as I post this update. I just need to know whether or not my gall bladder is a keeper. If it's in good shape, that's great, but I'm back to square one and will continue the quest.
b) Stephen is still sick. Poor, baby. Not sick enough to go to the doctor or to lay around, but sick enough, they would call me to check him out from school because his nose is so runny. Plus, call me overprotective, I just like having my baby by my side when he's not up to par. We believe he has allergies. You know: runny nose, cough, red eyes, etc. However, it was after 1:00 am before he went to sleep last night and hit the ground running at 6:24 this morning. Something is wrong with this picture. He's been pulling at his right ear. I talked to the doc on the phone and he told me to go ahead and give him the Orapred (I think it is) that I have in the fridge to see if that helps the symptoms. If they come back, bring him in and we'll try another allergy med. My gut is telling me to get him in to see the DR. before the weekend.
So, considering I have no good news at the time, let me share something sweet. This is the peanut butter cookie recipe my mama always made when I was little. Even today, every time I make them, I feel like that four year old with no worries who ate them while I sat under the crabapple tree until I became sick.
Mama's Miracle Cookies (there is no flour in this recipe)
1 cup - peanut butter
1 cup - sugar
1 - egg
1 - teaspoon vanilla
Mix all ingredients together, shape into balls, gently press the tops with fork tines that have been dipped in a little water. Bake at 350 for about 10 minutes. These cookies are so yummy. You'll never miss the flour.  
note: I line my cookie sheet with nonstick foil for easy cleanup. Also, this makes a crunchy cookie. If you like them chewy, add up to 2 tablespoons of water.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Waiting ...

So yesterday I spent the first day of Spring Break at the hospital, having tests done.  ... Bummer.

First, the ultra sound, which was either negative or inconclusive. They wouldn't share this information with me. But I know it wasn't positive for gall stones or they wouldn't have had to send me to nuclear medicine to put me through another two and a half hours of a HIDA scan (which was most unpleasant, by the way). ::sigh:: But as a reward for my inconvenience and torture, I stopped by Arby's and ordered a beef and cheddar combo. And, it didn't even make me sick. I was starving to death because I couldn't have anything to eat or drink after midnight on Sunday. I can go without food but I always have water close by. I was parched.
Stephen spent his first day of Spring Break with his daddy. He's coming down with a viral nose and throat thing and I felt it was best to keep him away from mama. He got to go to a meeting with his dad (poor daddy). The VP of a company he's been trying to meet with flew all the way up from Tampa to meet with him. One of those things you just can't rearrange at the last minute. So they treated the nice man to breakfast at ... McDonald's. LoL! Have I ever mentioned that I'm one of those people who has the worst timing you can imagine? Thankfully, the man he met with loves kids and has a few of his own so he was very understanding.
Now, we wait for the results. Of the meeting and the tests.
While we wait, lets take a look at prom pictures.
Somewhere Over The Rainbow Prom 2007 (at the center)
Stephen on the dance floor. Travolta has nothing on him.

I don't think these pretty ladies will mind that I posted this photo of them with this most handsome fella. (I'll post now, ask later) His teachers in grade 4 and 5.

awww, no words needed.

Dancing with Mom. Please try to overlook the fact that mom didn't feel well and it shows.

... The End ...


Friday, April 13, 2007


I've been putting off this update for two good reasons.
Reason #1 - I don't feel good. I haven't felt good in weeks. (years, really)
Reason #2 - I've been waiting for something good to journal about.
Something good did actually happen. Last week was my son's prom at the center. I took some pain meds and forced myself to go and I'm glad I did. It lifted my spirits to see how happy the children were! I have uploaded the photos and will try to post them soon. So stay tuned!
OK, I'm ready to talk about this. Friends, I've been sick. I've been sick for 6 years. I've been tested and tested and tested. Then, tested some more. I was beginning to think I was losing my mind. I've had so much wrong with my stomach for soooo long, it feels as though I've been beaten and kicked in the stomach and back. Three weeks ago I seemed to get worse over night. All of a sudden, I just couldn't take it anymore. The pain became so intense. I became so depressed, I almost shut down. If I have any friends in my offline life reading this, I apologize for not answering my phone and returning your calls. I have only been returning business calls and only because I have to for the sake of the business. I don't want to talk about it, but I feel that I can write about it. Make sense? I don't know if I'm depressed because I'm so sick or if I'm sick because I am so depressed.  I realize the two go hand-in-hand. I think it's possible that after more than 14 years of being primary caregiver, I simply wore myself out. I probably made myself sick by neglecting myself. The hubs wasn't as supportive as I would have liked. Telling me I wouldn't be in this shape if I had taken better care of myself, blah-blah-blah. That's nice. Yet, I know he has a point. But would it kill him to be a little supportive? There's nothing worse than being sick and feeling like you're being punished for it. Anyone who knows me knows that I'm the type who thinks everything is my fault anyway. After hearing that, I only stated this fact: "Yep, you're right. For more than 14 years I've been putting everyone else's needs before my own." Enough of me being the Martyr. My son needs me to take care of myself so I can take care of him. Right now, his needs are the only ones that matter. I've learned that no one is going to love and take care of him like I do so I have to live forever. That's all there is to it.
So I finally broke down and went to our family doctor on Wednesday and after he poked around my stomach and back he's about 99% sure it's my gall bladder. Inflammation would explain the fever I've been having. When it's flared up over the last six years, I would have unexplainable fever, flu-like symptoms and pain. It had actually gotten a lot better and then came back with a vengeance. I'm going Monday to the diagnostic center for tests. As usual, I have bad timing. Our spring break begins on Monday. I have no one to watch Stephen except my poor mama who is doing worse than I am. God bless her, she volunteered to watch him. It's the busy season for my husband, being he's in the construction field. If he isn't on a job site, he's having to work in the fab shop.
I feel like I'm rambling here so I'll wrap this up. My friend Beth told me to try to schedule the surgery (that is if I need the old gall bladder removed) for a Friday so she can spend the weekend with me and help with Stephen. She took an enormous amount of weight off my shoulders by offering to do that. The doc says I should be able to return to work by Tuesday and my mama says that she'll get daddy to bring her over on Monday to help get Stephen ready for school, cook supper and pamper her baby. (awww, that makes me tear up)
So maybe next week I'll finally know what's wrong with my stomach after all these years. I was diagnosed with IBS four years ago. I think that's the label they give you when they don't know what's wrong with your tummy. I've had my gall bladder tested twice and all was okay. But, that was four years ago. To spare you from more of this rambling, I'll go for now.
Y'all take care and I'll upload those photos soon.